Practicing Self-Love: My 10 Commandments

self love
I am glad that you are reading this post. This isn’t by chance or you just so happened to “stumble” across this post. It was meant to be. Self-love is an individual journey that only YOU can pilot, but often we allow others to direct us consciously and/or unconsciously.

In 2013 I met my mentor, Marion Christopher Pugh, who inspired me to develop my own journey of self-love through his everyday life. He has created his own environment of tranquility, happiness, and support even in the most toxic areas and moments. If you ever have a conversation with Chris I am sure you have heard him say “love yourself.” These two words carried me since I have met him. Sounds completely cheesy, but that is where my true self-love journey began and I am still growing. This journey is a life-time mastery, but it is beautiful struggle that takes time, patience, and daily compassion.

Here are my 10 commandments for practicing self-love. Please be advised that I am far from a professional and I do not have all the answers, but I am simply sharing my general day-to-day tips 🙂

  1. Do not compare yourself to others. Know yourself know your worth. 
  2. Surround yourself with good people. Sometimes people are in our lives for a season, while some are in our lives forever.  End the toxic relationships TODAY. 
  3. Set goals. Regardless if your goals are big or small, work on them daily and celebrate once you have reached them! Cheers to losing 10 pounds! Congrats on getting that promotion on your job! Celebrate your wins! Treat yourself on your hard work! No one can support you like YOU!
  4. Acknowledge and embrace your “flaws.” Those little “imperfections” are what makes you the beautiful person that you are. Be the best version of yourself always regardless of how others may feel!
  5. This might be your least favorite commandment, but it necessary for growth. STEP OUTSIDE THAT COMFORT ZONE! You will be surprised how many hidden talents you host by crushing fear in the moment and doing something new!
  6. Understand that self love is not an overnight process. Self love is an evolutionary practice that takes patience and consistency with plenty of support and kindness from yourself.
  7. Allow yourself to be human at all times. Forgive yourself and look towards the future because you can not control the past. 
  8. Become in tune with your inner voice and make sure it is nothing short of love, positivity, peace, and encouragement. Sounds somewhat corny, but I am certain we have all torn ourselves down here and there for various reasons. You deserve love and respect. Period.
  9. Trash the need for approval by others because they do not validate who YOU are as person. Sadly there will always be someone out there who does not like you. It is their problem, not yours. Do not investigate the reasons love. Save your energy. 
  10. Celebrate life every single day. Encourage, love, and appreciate those who support you. Find the joy within yourself and live your amazing life. 


Find out how you are being your worst enemy – Develop questions about your life every morning (ex. What is my purpose?) – Find out family history of barriers and how they came over their problems (ex. How did they put their problems in perspective?) – Find out abuse/maltreatment that you choose to normalize – Understand that close mouths end up dead (Talk to someone you can trust!)

I hope this post was helpful and insightful. Take care of your mental health by feeding it with positivity, love, and encouragement. Thank you Chris for always being YOU.

Georgia Southern University Eagles in Diversity Awards 2014. Me (left) Chris (right)
Georgia Southern University Eagles in Diversity Awards 2014. Me (left) Chris (right)

Want to contact Chris?

Let’s talk! What are your practices of self-love? Comment below!

Love Yourself,

Chasity Lenae


6 thoughts on “Practicing Self-Love: My 10 Commandments

  1. This was absolutely beautiful! Self love is so important!! and these are really good steps to get you where you need to go! I myself learned the importance of self love years ago and it has honestly made me who I am today! Though I’m not complete, I am constantly evolving into a better me! good read!!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Yes! It’s all about the evolution of you. Everyday I strive to be better than I was yesterday. Self-love has allowed me to love and accept others in my life. May your journey continue to carry you to your best! 🙂 thank you!

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I am actually getting to that place where I can love me whole-heartedly. I am to the point where I realize my family’s doubts, struggles and barriers will not determine the type of person I become. I’m starting to love me…literally 🙂 Thank you, boo! This post was definitely inspiring!!

    Liked by 1 person

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